It’s not optional. Determination, willpower, persistence, resolve: Ammar Alraees has all the details below.
A few days ago, I ran into an old schoolmate I hadn’t seen in at least 15 years. After a healthy few minutes of catching up, I asked him what he was up to now. He told me he’d never had a steady 9-to-5 job, that he’d worked odd jobs, and that he was now doing his “own thing.” It figures, I thought. He had never been good at school, and always seemed to be in trouble. As kids, we saw his parents at the school so regularly that it wasn’t even shocking or worth talking about. He was what you would call a troublemaker—even though he had a heart of gold.
The conversation didn’t stop there. The more we talked, the more it seemed that his “own thing” was actually a number of legitimate businesses! The fact that he had done it all on his own was even more eye-opening. I asked him, “Since you haven’t taken the conventional route, how did you get where you are today?”
His answer came so smoothly, without a shred of pride or pompousness. “I worked odd jobs until I saved enough money to set up shop in Dubai. I’d always heard that Dubai had a lot of opportunities, so that was my goal.” Just like that. He wanted to set up in Dubai. That was his long-term goal.
Many of us, including myself, have been guilty of this; we have preconceived notions about being able to do something with minimal effort, and assume we will achieve our goals.
“Why did you come back to Bahrain, then?” I figured he’d say that he couldn’t make it in the highly competitive Dubai market (I’m still being cynical here.)
“I had to sell it off, because I had a couple of deaths in the family, and I’m the only provider now.” Again, simple as that. Not because of what I thought, but because of a personal decision HE had made.
This reminded me of a talk I recently watched by Angela Lee Duckworth, who spoke about grit. Angela is a math teacher who studied her pupils to see what makes for better students—those more likely to earn a lot of money in the future, and land (and keep) better jobs.
Social intelligence, good looks, and IQ were not the answer; it was grit, resolve, and the strength of character to keep pushing, no matter what the circumstances. Grit, according to Angela, is “the passion and perseverance for very long-term goals” and “sticking with your future, day in and day out.”
Social intelligence, good looks, and IQ were not the answer; it was grit, resolve, and the strength of character to keep pushing, no matter what the circumstances.
Talent, Angela notes, is inversely related (or unrelated) to grit. This can actually give hope to people who might perceive themselves as untalented, but still need to find their purpose in life.
The meeting I had with my old schoolmate—and the Angela video I watched—reinforced the idea that grit matters. A lot.
Many of us, including myself, have been guilty of this; we have preconceived notions about being able to do something with minimal effort, and assume we will achieve our goals. As Angela’s students’ grades attested, this is not usually the case. Those with grit took longer to learn their lessons, but they actually scored better than the “talented” ones.
You were not born with grit, but you can certainly obtain it—by focusing day in and day out upon your goal, and refusing to stop, despite the obstacles. If your goals are achievable, there is no reason why they can’t be met, no matter what the circumstances.
